The Story Begins

 So now you know a little about me let me tell you how I started my life with melanoma. I had a mole on my left thigh. I saw it every time I sat on the toilet. I watched it for a while, much to long in fact and called the doctor. I thought I was being pro active. The last time I had asked a surgeon to remove a bump on my arm it turned out to be a thorn surrounded by scar tissue that I never knew was even there. I wasn't worried which is why when the results came back and the surgeon, the father of the boy my daughter was dating, told me it was Melanoma I was shocked. Shocked is an understatement I was amazed. He told me how the lesion was 1.2cm which meant I would be referred to the regional cancer center. anything under 1 cm and I would be done for now with follow ups on the plan. I have said often that the .2cm saved me.
 I met with my surgeon within ten days. She explained the procedure of Local Wide Dissection, she would take 2cm of tissue in all directions surrounding the lesion. We also discussed a Sentinel Node Biopsy which had become the standard for any tumor over 1 cm. I of course asked prognosis, odds of the SNB being positive all the big questions that the Cancer word immediately puts in your head. My surgeon said with a negative SNB my prognosis was in the 90%-95% of never dealing with the disease again. If there was spread to the Sentinel Node things could change but given the size of my initial lesion the chance of the Sentinel Node being positive were only 15% -20%. Seems I was the lucky winner because pathology reports showed microscopic disease in the Sentinel Node. Here we go.
 The next few weeks were filled with CT scans, MRI's, Ultrasounds and worry. My primary physician prescribed Lorazepam which helped but it just took off the edge. One particularly rough night was when the CT showed a "spot" on my liver. My surgeon called to say she ordered an Ultrasound and explained to me that almost half the population have Hemangiomas, masses of blood vessels resembling a strawberry birthmark, on their livers, she said don't worry yet. Sure , I can do that, maybe in an alternate universe. Turns out it was hemangioma and I was set for surgery. Diagnosis on April 20 and last surgery , Radical Lymph node Dissection on June 12. Following surgery we would move to a course of Interferon.
 The surgery went well, 26 nodes were removed and a flap was created to protect my femoral artery now that so much tissue was removed. I healed well and at the end of six weeks was ready for the next phase, Interferon, but that's for next time.  

Let me introduce myself

 My name is Beth. I am a 56 year old Ginger. Born in the USA but living in Canada. In 2010 I was first diagnosed with stage IIIA Surface Spreading Melanoma with micrometastases in the Sentinel Node in my left groin. Recently, after almost nine years of living NED I found a lump in the left groin and now have become a member of the group who have Loco-Regional Recurrence. That's my medical status but I haven't really introduced myself have I?

 I grew up in the time where sunscreen was Coppertone with an SPF of 2. The preferable choice was baby oil anyway. A blistering sunburn Monday morning at school meant you had a great weekend. Our family had a cottage on Lake Erie and every weekend was spent there. In the boat, on the beach, in the water, sun, sun, sun. I guess what I am trying to say is I was a walking billboard for Melanoma. I was usually healthy, mother of three kids, house full of dogs, somewhat reserved about my personal life but known for usually having a smile on my face. My grandfather was a doctor and my family was full of medical professionals so I was never intimidated by any health professionals and always advocated for the best care for myself and my family. Never afraid to question anybody, in a polite respectful way of course, most of the time. My family lived through some very tragic circumstances starting early in my life so I became a "strong" person or better yet someone who recognises that just like good times, bad times don't last and they sometimes prepare you for what is coming. Even though you can't live your life waiting for the bad turn to come. I think this gives you a general idea of me. My outlook is optimistic though practical, when faced with a problem my first reaction his how to "fix" the issue. I tend to always find a reason to smile or laugh because I know that is the only way to contentment. I believe that no change is bad or good of itself it is how we meet the change and adjust is one of our defining characteristics. Melanoma was a huge change in my life, how I see myself, how it changed me, how I have integrated this disease in to my life instead of letting it define who I am is why I have started this blog and what I want this blog to be about.
I hope to help people who have been diagnosed, those who care for those diagnosed, those learning about the disease, anyone know that if I consider myself to be more than a Melanoma or Cancer survivor so can they. Disease does not have to define us, it's just part of who we are. Sometimes it takes more of our energy and thought but not all the time. Sometimes it's just our quiet empathy, our desire to warn others and unique appreciation of what life truly means to us that may be the give away that we have been changed by disease. I hate this disease but in many ways like the person it has forced me to become.